…and anyone else waking up at 3AM to watch the Royal Wedding. It is official! After years of searching, I have finally found a way to equate a girl’s excitement about something to a guy’s feeling about sports.
I am pretty much the average guy when it comes to following sports; I am not in any fantasy leagues, I watch football on Sundays when it doesn’t interfere with anything in my life and I go to about 5 sporting events a year. One thing that I never did is wake up at 3:30 in the morning to watch a game. When I was in Israel, I missed the World Series and watched about half of the Superbowl.
But I now realize that when girls ask “What is so interesting that needs to put everything else on hold?” what they are really asking is “Why don’t I have anything like that?”
The answer to that is that if you did, you would blow it further out of proportion than guys have done to the Superbowl. If there was an annual Royal Wedding that took place every April, it would become an international holiday. And just like a guy would drag his girlfriend/wife to a Superbowl party with the promise of social interaction, a girl would do the same to her boyfriend/husband with the promise of food. Only when the guy is dragged out of bed at some ungodly hour, giving into the prospect of an awesome breakfast that may include eggs, waffles and pancakes over his precious sleep, he is subjected to tea and biscuits! Everyone would come dressed as some member of royalty, and who knows? We could even have a mock wedding before the actual festivities. The only way guys would be able to deal with the event would be to make up betting lines on the wedding. Lines may include:
- Length of first kiss
- First person to cry
- Number of people outside Westminster Abby
- Length of Prince’s nose
And the argument that I absolutely do not want to hear anymore is “these athletes don’t care about you.” Because guess what, the Royal Family cares less about you. AND there is more of a chance of me meeting any Kansas City Royal, Sacramento King, Los Angeles King or even Prince Fielder than the chance of you meeting any member of the Royal family. So I have free reign to buy a jersey, because how many brides out there will try to model their dress after the new Princess’s?
And no, Erachet is not making me get up to watch the wedding, nor is sports something that we have yet to argue about. This is just an observation by someone who grew up not being allowed to watch TV on a school night unless there was some sort of major sporting event going on, and had to defend this to a sister who didn’t have anything similar to it. The complaint should not have been “why can he watch?” but “why don’t I have anything that I care about?”